We never used to talk about them in detail. However a few weeks ago, he asked me about them and I was very open about them. He was taken aback and I then felt bad for sharing the details - I guess they are just so familiar to me and I forgot that they may have an impact on someone else hearing them. Since then we just call them "dark thoughts" but know what we are referring to. He doesn't encourage me to talk about them when they are more powerful as he says focusing on them can give them more strength.

He has never said that he would breach confidentiality unless he was very concerned about my safety. We have an unwritten agreement that I would always contact him first, which I guess is reassuring to him.

In terms of dark secrets, he told me that he would always be on my side and even if I said that I had committed an awful crime then he would have to inform the police to stop me doing it, but he would still be on my side and work with me. I thought that was reasonable.