You say that you want your therapist to accept your views regarding boundaries and not force her views on you, and yet that seems to be exactly what you are doing to me in your response.

I have already decided on what my boundaries are, and they are based on a lot of critical thought, reflection, and experience. I've seen the negative effects that can come from dual relationships, and I do not want to engage in them at all, at any cost. I do not WANT to be in these kinds of situations with my students. It would prevent ME from having a good time. It would be awkward and uncomfortable for ME. Me and my friends/date would simply leave and go somewhere else and have a great time at another venue.

The primary reason I leave is because I do not WANT to be there. However, I also feel that it would be entirely unprofessional for me to leave my role as their professor at the door-- even at a retreat-- and allow my students to see me drink, exhibit PDA, curse, share personal stories, etc. They would have seen something they were not supposed to see, and they could not simply "forget" that when they showed up to class on Monday morning. They would see me differently, even unconsciously. In all likelihood, they would also tell their friends/classmates, begin to ask me personal questions, or think that we could have a dual relationship or attend similar events in the future. I've seen these things spiral out of control, and I do not want to put myself in that situation. I want to keep my professional life and my personal life entirely separate. Any overlap makes me feel claustrophobic and yucky. It's also true that when professors do these kinds of things, the entire department talks. It looks really bad on those professors, and they lose a lot of professional respect. Whether or not that is right is not the issue-- it happens. My career is very important to me. Keeping that work/life balance in check also allows me to get the "break" that I need from my job so that I can have a job AND a life. I would suspect that many therapists feel similarly. We all need a BREAK from work; who wants work to creep in and invade your personal life and your down time?

Have you ever held the kind of job where you have students, clients, or something similar? If you have, it might be easier for you to understand this from the T/prof perspective. I think it's easy for clients and students to think it would be "fun" to have these experiences with their Ts/profs. However, it is not similarly "fun" for those of us on this side!