things lately have sucked. i just found out one of my really good friends is moving in 2 weeks. at the begining of january another one of my friends moved. and i havent even talked to her since then. my BEST friend moved in september. and it sucks so bad. and now im having problems with the guy i like, who also happens to be one of my good friends. i dont know what he feels but i dont want to ask him and make everything awkward if he doesnt feel the same way. but i like him so much, i get hardcore butterflies when i think of him. for some reason im frigen terrified of going to prom. im exhausted and completly stressed out. i have trouble falling asleep at night and i cant wake up in the morning. and now my grandfathers in the hospital. and im extremly afraid of people dying. 6 years ago my other grandfather died, and i never got over it. i still cry about it at night. i cry basically every night now. i dont know why. and i dont know if i can deal with another death. i feel like cutting again. im just basically hating life right now.