Wow! You seem to be pretty clear headed about it now, so I guess if it were me, I would continue on that path for awhile. That is, no meds.
Being able to think is kind of a big deal, especially for a depressed person don't you think?
I have dealt with this clinical depression thing for a really long time, on & off meds. What I see in you, is someone with a will to change, which is more than half the battle if you ask me.
Because you know sitting on your butt with a video controller in your hands is probably not the best thing for you, maybe start to taper off of that.
In my experience, especially when I was younger, I found physical activity to be key to my regaining some sense of self and a reasonable amount of productivity. It also REALLY and Truly kept the depression at bay.
At the time, I read & read and found that it was a bit like your doc who said it is 'mind over matter'. My doc at the time wanted me to stay medicated, I wanted off that not-so-merry-go-round, I wanted my life back, without the drugs.
I started a rigorous physical training program I designed for myself. I got off meds and lived to get that endorphin high I could get from exercise 3 or 4 days a week. I prevailed, it works! I am living proof that we depressed people can sometimes take control. I won't say it is easy, it is not, but for me, worth it.
I am older now, have an injury that keeps me down physically, but I am still med free, still have down (really down) days, but I know I will get back to a better place. I let myself ride it out without judging myself too harshly.
Sorry if this sounds, too chipper, whatever, but I couldn't just read your story and not tell you; you know yourself best, you can make this happen if you want to. You can at least try, you have nothing to lose.
I allow myself the knowledge that I have depression. I still have a life, and I choose to make it the best life I can, even if sometimes it is extra hard.
I am rooting for me! I am rooting for you.
Keep us posted!
All the very best to you as you face this beast...