Holy guacamole, Batman

One crisis averted, now onto the next.

A 48,000-gallon storage tank containing 4-Methylcyclohexane Methanol was discovered to be leaking into a nearby river today. “This material pretty much floats on the water, and it’s floating downstream, and eventually it will dissipate, but you can’t actually get in there and remove it,” said a spokesman for the department of environmental protection,

The governor has declared a state of emergency for nine counties. We are told, do not use tap water for drinking, cooking, washing or bathing. The only safe use of the water is to flush toilets or put out fires.

As you may have guessed all stores in the area are sold out of water. Freaking great. All I have to drink right now are several bottled Frappucinos.