Well, I went to the doctors and I told her everything that I'd been hiding. She gave me the number for the crisis team and has referred me onto the mental health team, who are going to call me today to arrange an appointment so I can get assessed. And then she told me that I will need to see her again in two weeks time. I won't lie... I am terrified. But, I know it's for the best because I'm getting pretty close to doing something I'll later regret.