quote: I know I have low self esteem. I recently went on an actual dating site for SINGLES but did not feel ready to go and meet them. someday I will. I am also not where I want to be in life and want more for myself. I don't like who I am right now.

As hard as it may sound, have you ever considered Not dating for awhile? Actually do something for yourself, do some things for You that will help You. I did this when I was young & single, took about a a year off, really did a lot of work on myself, then felt better prepared to get out there again. I think I had more to offer & it showed.
Just a thought...