No need to jump on MM, she's just another mom trying to help. She's been through a lot.
She's saying to remove objects daughter could hurt herself with. I've been through similar with my 2 older kids.
I am sorry what you're going through. I don't understand inpatient though just for writing a sui note - wouldn't most of the world be locked up then? How did you find the notes?

I don't agree with slapping. I did slap my son once at that age & told our therapist. He said it may have some shock value at first, but not the best message. My son ended up very violent - not because of that but anger problems related to MI & dad abandonment. He has tried to strangle me. He's been hospitalized 10 times in teen years for violence threatening the family with knives & cutting himself. it's been a nightmare.

My daughter was mouthy like your daughter sounds. I didn't see warning signs & she od'd on aspirin at 14, I barely got her to the hospital on time. These are the hardest years. Here self esteem, health, future, life are all vulnerable at this age.

I strongly don't agree with squirting water on her. that's very demeaning & humiliating. I admit I tried similar things with my son to no avail. Please don't do that to her, it will lead to resentment. I'd recommend rather you let her know you love her and ask what can you do to help when she's really angry. it's very important to stay calm but very hard too.

what has worked, the only thing that has worked when they're suicidal is to have a bond of trust and open-ness to be able to talk to each other. One good doctor during one of her hospitalizations told me to remember to be playful with my daughter. I realized that in my own depression, I'd forgotten how to show my kids how to be fun & resilient.

Talk to her, communication as much as possible. She needs to be told by you that you care & love her, over & over. Anything brought up about the past, I say ok what can I do to help you right now, I want to help you, I love you. We don't want her to feel like a bad horrible person just because she's being a mouthy pre-teen. You can let her know she can get through it and that you're there to help, that you'll get through it together.

Best of luck, take care.