((thickntired)),

First of all I just want to mention I am not a therapist or professional. However, I did look at your profile and I noticed you have PTSD and other diagnoses too. I am curious if you have ever been tested for ADHD? I am just thinking about your effort to get sober, and a lot of people that become addicts are people who struggle with ADHD, I have had to do some of my own research on that because I am married to one for 33 years now. At times one would think he suffers from OCD, or is up and down bipolar, nope, he has ADHD and he definitely has a hard time relaxing/sitting still etc.

As far as really struggling as you finally address the trauma's in your past, yes, that can bring forward a lot of deep emotional challenges and uncomfortable and troubling bouts with anxiety and overall restlessness.

Please honor your sobriety, and I understand that can be a challenge. You "could" go to AA meetings for support, that has been a saving grace for my husband. There are a lot of people that go to these meetings that don't just struggle with the addiction, but have underlying challenges that led them to becoming an addict. So you "can" find different people who are further along that can be very supportive where you get that extra so you don't end up turning to alcohol to numb yourself again, that really is not the answer, and you do know that by now.

Knowledge does empower, alcohol doesn't provide that, so do your best to get support with that. Building up a good support system is key to making progress.

(((Hugs)))
OE