Quote:
Originally Posted by PeeJay
I am healing from PTSD from abuse, as well as several abandonments. I was a foster kid.
But a new thing is happening that makes me hate my own thoughts: I am extremely angry about what happened to me and jealous of people with good enough families.
As in, I met a woman age 25 with a PhD who does nonprofit work, and I think, well aren't you perfect with your intact family and lawyer dad? It's easy to be morally superior than the rest of us when you've been supported your entire life and when you've been loved your entire life. And when your parents supported you all through school.
I know that everyone has their own struggles and I know that I shouldn't compare myself to other people. But there is a new ugliness within me I didn't have before I started processing all this trauma. Can anyone else relate?
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Hi PeeJay,
I read your post when you put it up and have spent the last day or so with it playing around in my head. My background seems a bit similar to yours in brief. I too have the same anger at people and their 'perfect' lives. To the point that this past week I had to talk my self out of screaming at someone complaining about their mother; all I could think was at least you have one!
I know what you mean when you refer to it as the ugliness. I've struggled with it so long that when people compliment me sometimes I think, wow if you only knew what sometimes goes through my mind!
So no you are not alone in this, and I'm sure as you work on what your journey is it will lessen or completely go away. That is my hope for you
