I have to say I'm not an advocate of divorce at all, though at the same time I think your situation is awful and that the two of you just don't fit. So I'm kind of torn as to what to tell you.

Your marriage is your commitment to your husband and a responsibility towards your children and family, for better or worse. I think it's important to think about that and how it affects everyone if you are considering divorce. And other than that I will only say that I don't think it is okay to be passing off the consequences of your actions to your children, your husband, or your extended family.