((( evie114 )))

How long have you been seeing this T?

You said...

"Isn't she suppossed to help me to understand my sytem so we can find out together how it works."

It sounded to me by her challenging your honesty (in regards to being suicidal) that she's trying to do just that.

"She says well I don't know how your system works and I don't think you are being honest about that part of you."

Try thinking of this as "I want to believe that you are being honest with me, but I don't know how your system works."

Maybe she was just looking for reassurance that you would not harm yourself or others?

Maybe you should email her and tell her exactly what you said here.