Hi CDnomore,
Thanks for sharing. Eventually, you could forgive your mom at your heart, at the point to wish her well, if that means healing for you. But forgiving does not mean having to deal with her again.
I believe that it is a printed, strong, and human tendency for us to crave our original family because family gatherings have been a natural part of survival and evolution of the human race. Once created, it takes a lot of effort from us to cut those ties. institutions, customary norms and other cultural elements reinforcing family ties are just rationalizing that very profound human inclination.