We have lived together for 18 months, he was originally working away for 3 weeks at a time and home for a week (for six months) he then finished work and was apparently committed to finding a job close to home and falling into a "normal" life. He was home for three months not working, throughout this time he told me his computer was not working, I explained I could have a look for him and try to fix it but he did not want me to. He then told me he had had it repaired and commenced using it to search for work. I asked to use his computer one day as mine wasnt working, while using his computer I came across months and months of hardcore porn use, dating site visits, swingers club information, I was overwhelmed and confronted him. He explained that the dating sites were from prior when he was single and had no idea how to delete them, he explained that the porn meant nothing and as for the swingers info he apparently says he was just curious. No explanation why his broken computer had managed to register numerous porn sites daily?
I tried to forget it, forgive and move on but also became very wary and suspicious, then commenced my obsession with wondering if he was being honest as he had obviously lied to me. He then found work on the opposite side of the country for a couple of months in his old home town, throughout this time away he stayed at a hotel room that he failed to tell me about and then got angry when I asked him, I found this out when he asked me to log onto his bank account and pay a bill for him. Since he has been back home and not working he has become distant, doesn't come near me at all, has learnt to delete his internet history, keeps his phone constantly in his pocket and I find a towel everyday that he has used to clean up his "mess" after masturbating. I have checked the cookies on his computer, there are still visits to porn sites, dating sites etc, whenever I ask him for honesty and the truth he lies and tells me, one he doesn't look at porn anymore and two he's not masturbating. I have given him every chance to leave but he wants to stay????? Why the lies I just don't understand.