my parents explained it like needing glasses to focus your eyes...only they were really kinda saying that i needed leg braces like on Forest Gump......or head gear. because all the sudden the teachers that thought i was a brat and was fighting them on purpose, were like "OOoooooooOOoooOh." and i'm like, "wtf? do you mean, oh? all the sudden? start accomodating me then if i'm frickin retarded!" but of course i couldn't say that to the powerful detention giver/parent calling trouble maker.

i can't focus on something unless i get into that hole of hyperfocusing and don't move for like literally 8 hours because i'm concentrating on a project...looking stuff up, drawing, cleaning, watching programs...sometimes thinking.

can't stand other kids or adults now, i guess. noise bugs the crap out of me. it's like, someone screaming for no reason...babies in echo-ey rooms type of painful noise. gah. the thought is almost fist clenching. but punk shows, punk music, deafening volume while driving...that's soothing for some reason.

trouble not asking why........yah. guess i was wrong so much as a kid i made it my rule to say nothing unless i know 100% and can cite a source. so unless it is strictly opinion, i promise everything i say or type is literally catalogued and saved on my computer, or highlighted in a book i've read twice...or more.

don't like to be touched anywhere but the hair. which is funny coz i do hair sometimes...went to school and got a diploma for cosmetology...in another state and california wont recognize it. sweeeeet. 10,500 bucks as TP for a bunghole. anyway. i can't stand anyone EVER touching my face. i have trouble returning physical affection. like hugs, snuggles and petting on the back or neck or you know...the bathing suit areas.....i just can't do it...i feels like someones scratching me with broken glass. tense up, close my eyes, kinda wimper. it's lame. coz i'm a kissy kind of girl, and for someone who can't even be lightly touched i'm COVERED with tattoos. but they felt good.

people ask you why you didn't do whatever or why you havent done something, and you try your darnedest to explain the brickwall that you come to after you get what you need ready to complete something, and cant even pull yourself up a knotted rope to victory on the opposite side. and you cant see the problem but are helpless to fix it. no matter how i explain....i'm "lazy" using "excuses" or taking "advantage" of something. which is total crap.

unless you are in the add/wtf? club there's just no possible way to show, explain, show proof that you are suffering and screaming.....but absolutely can't be heard.