Hello everyone, my first post and really the reason how I ended of finding this community!

My mother in law has a long term diagnosis of bipolar with her first episode, according to her ex husband, almost immediately following the birth of her first child.

She has no insight into her condition, I believe this genuinely is a symptom of her disorder and not a denial, so does not take medication. As a result she is regularly hospitalised and since I have been together with her son, seven years, I would say she is sectioned (forcibly detained under law) on average 3 times a year, sometimes more, sometimes less. Since we had our son 15 months ago, as consequence or by coincidence, Her health has worsened, she rapid cycles and her highs incredibly high and lows incredibly low and the spaces in between see her personality range from poisonous, aggressive, selfish, needy, desperate and scared.

I do feel incredibly sorry for her but having been at the the receiving end of to many vicious comments I find it hard to play happy families and pretend nothing was said when her clouds have lifted. She has begun a very vocal campaign of wanting to come and live with us but I am 100% convinced that this would not be the right thing to do, she is still relatively young at 65, and I just don't think my relationship with her son could withstand the pressure and I am loathe to bring my son up against this background.

Fundamentally I think she is lonely, she has friends that she can do things with but no one she can do nothing with, if that makes sense. She has sadly lost some of her friends as when she isn't quite on balance she doesn't realise how rude she is and can easily cause offence without really being malicious (for example when she learned a friends daughter had been diagnosed with muscular sclerosis she said her friend must be pleased as she would now have a greater role in her daughters life)

I am quite keen to explore the idea of a retirement village to see if she would consider this as an option, plenty of people within the community, she can live independently but join in the activities she likes. I doubt she would go for this but has anyone else had success, found solutions that have worked for them?

Sorry, very long post! Any help, advice welcome