Thanks - that looks like a great website. I didnt mean to be unsupportive or pushy. I think it's important to figure out and really feel and describe where you are, where you're starting from. It IS sad. It's ironic that my t is always asking what im feeeeeeling, then when we say something like this, we're pushed off it to the "next step" right away. Sorry i did that. I kinda wobble back and forth - i can do this, i can't do this!