I originally posted this in PTSD Forum. Like to get more ideas or others experience .

I need ideas. Last week I had a severe emotional flashback with every intentions of ending my life. Long story short my therapist came through for me and was able to un-trigger me. I still feel like I crawled out of a horrific car wreck alive and last week still haunts me. While my head is clear I need to come up with an action plan, a step by step instructions in a sealed envelope to open when this happens again. Kind of like a "break glass in-case of emergency" kind of thing. When I am in the flashback I can barely breathe let alone think rationally. Perhaps something in that envelope to stop me in my tracks and to redirect my focus or get my feelings to change direction. Ideas?

I sent this idea to T:
I was thinking of a series of sealed envelopes with a short letter from My H and from you, if I had a real friend that new my situation that would be great but I don't, saying something supportive, the impact of my actions or something along those lines. Still would like a step by step plan. Perhaps reading the letters would be step one,if the is not working then a person to call. That is all the ideas I have for now.

He replied:

Hm? I like the creativity! Could you maybe consider a letter from yourself, too. That is: a letter from you when you are "feeling better." Yes, of course you would know what it says in advance...but still. If you are ever in a life-threatening emergency, I continue to hope that you will consider calling 911. I know you have not agreed with this in the past, but it is a wise option if the going gets too tough.

I would NEVER call 911.........the humiliation, reduced to shame, rights taken away......yes I would rather die.