No support system, no family nearby. I have had to shut people out of my life because they say things that trigger me, and/or they end up hurting me. I therefore feel like I cannot trust anybody. The people I do latch onto, I put on a pedestal, and when they let me down, it nearly destroys me. I can't even talk to my mom on the phone because it leaves me feeling suicidal. My mom was never there for me as a child - I was neglected emotionally and abandoned in many ways.

I don't know how to get out of this funk. I feel like nobody cares. The only other people I know who can begin to understand the crushing pain I feel are Borderlines too, and they are in no position to help because they're always in a crisis too. Please, please, please, I just need somebody to comfort me and help me through this. I just need some friends. I am so broken. My life is constant agony. I cry alone each day. I alternate between periods of telling myself I don't need anybody, or else sobbing because I have nobody who cares. If one more person tells me an "easy fix" to my problems, I'm going to scream.