Quote:
Originally Posted by growlithing
My mother was a helicopter parent for a while in some regards. She used to stalk my high school grades and email my teachers during the school day and brush my teeth and control everything. But then she kinda just dropped me off at college and left me. I was out of sight and out of mind. That was really hard for me my freshman year because I felt so abandoned and lost. I literally didn't know how to do anything and she wasn't there for me if I called her because she really was never there for me. She didn't teach me to do anything but hate myself and everyone around me. She'd just step in and do everything because she said I never did anything right and she wasn't there for me emotionally either.
I distinctly remember a lesson I had my freshman year. My teacher was angry with me about something. I probably was totally disorganized and obviously not taking care of myself. He asked me "where are your parents? Did they just drive you out here and left you on the streets to fend for yourself? Why do you seem to have absolutely no guidance?" At the time, he didn't know anything about the nature of my home life and had no idea that saying that would be really really harsh. I guess I have improved since then. I don't walk into lessons completely unprepared and disheveled. My mom would totally manage my time and tell me when to study for how long and what to study so I came into school with no ability to manage my time. I got a bit better about that.
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"Helicopter parents" is the wrong term i suppose. I was thinking of privileged kids who have parents who are over involved BUT do it out of love and overprotection. Clearly you had the over involvement without the care behind it.
What you went through/go through is awful. It does suck that people assume a lot without knowing you.
I once had a professor say that maybe I need to spend more time on my illustration work and drop the part time job to focus more... "besides how many cds/dvds do you need?" That was so insulting to me because the job was out of necessity. parents paid my tuition but nothing else and I was scraping by.