Quote:
Originally Posted by growlycat
"Helicopter parents" is the wrong term i suppose. I was thinking of privileged kids who have parents who are over involved BUT do it out of love and overprotection. Clearly you had the over involvement without the care behind it.
What you went through/go through is awful. It does suck that people assume a lot without knowing you.
I once had a professor say that maybe I need to spend more time on my illustration work and drop the part time job to focus more... "besides how many cds/dvds do you need?" That was so insulting to me because the job was out of necessity. parents paid my tuition but nothing else and I was scraping by.
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Well, what's really difficult about this whole thing is that my parents have no financial need. My parents are rather wealthy and they said they'd pay for everything. And that would be fine if they didn't constantly threaten to cut me off and use it to completely control my life behind my back. I have absolutely no power over really anything because nothing is in my name. I don't even qualify for tons of things like need based financial aid because I'm not an independent and my parents have no financial need at all.
And then there are people who try to guilt me for complaining about my life because my parents give me money. Or they just assume that because of my ability to get access to some money that my life is easy. And it's just like... I'm happy I've gotten the money that I have but at the same time, I own nothing and my parents are horrible and constantly threaten to abandon me completely. That's get I get so angry when anyone tries to tell me that my parents love me because they fund me. Maybe my mom does in her own twisted way, but it is completely meaningless because if money is how she expresses "love", she is like an abusive partner who constantly threatens me that she'll leave me if I do anything she disagrees with or says she won't love me anymore if I do x. And no one would try to tell me that if I were dating someone who did that to me that he "loved me in his own way" because that's not real love. It's control.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill3
It's interesting how you say that I don't even know where to start and in the very next sentence you explain how you are starting!  You are leveraging your music skills and connections into some "real world" experience that can serve as a backup for you.
It's just hard for you to believe that you can really pull it off, whereas naturally you feel more confident in your strongest suit. What you said about mistakes in music, though, can also happen in the "real world": You make some mistakes and you figure out ways to get yourself out.
When you get down to the "brass tacks" of what you are actually doing, it really sounds like you are growing in your ability to manage your affairs. |
I'm growing in that I can recognize that I need a job and I'm trying to just be realistic in where I apply. That is growing because a year ago, I wouldn't have said I need a job. But it isn't enough growth.