My imagination, safety mentally(not emotional) I mean with hallucinations, producing atmosphere's making worlds of this existence with music mainly, but sometimes game design. Female companion friends and this girl I am talking to and specific people I really appreciate in my life. I like to imagine even if I am adult, I like to imagine if I could stay as a child when I was like 4 years old. Forget my life now, and just go around being how I want to see my true personality grow without the stress that perversed it so long. I was a very cute child, I was so goofy all the time, I'd do anything to go back there and feel safe when either my grandma my mom or any female who was closer to my age, teenager, preteen, or my age at the time took care of me. I miss crawling up into a ball and being so comfy. I realize I can't sleep like I used to because I sleep easier with a female companion, like it countlessly shows many of times. Even girls I didn't date or weren't sexual with I slept with them in that way, and I could sleep so well not because I had physical feelings for them like I really could feel safe that someone is here for me.