Therapy is a gift to myself and has a priority kind of like my mortgage and other bills that have to get paid. When I have to have something, I know now that I will get it but I rearrange discretionary funding (like food or other things I want) to get it rather than have-to bills. I don't buy things so spur of the moment anymore nowadays, I wait a bit and think about it, what I'll use it for, what it will feel like in a month, year, etc. after I have it, etc. Some things I have found I like knowing about but don't really need to "own". Other things I know are not the only one in the world and I can find one later if I realize I really want it.

I would have just told her I couldn't pay her that week, asked could I pay a few weeks after, not have gone into detail?