Perhaps, due to your own life experiences, you view the notion of how she was approached for the painting, differently, than she does. After all, you mentioned feeling that she's trying to justify his proposition as 'respectable', and deep down your post speaks to seeing it differently. How do, two people with varying views resolve this. She may view it, as innocent, your take is as though she's doing things for another, a former flame no less, than she'd willfully offer to you?
Then, come, the justifications. For what some would say innocent, others would say disrespectful.
Perhaps, focus, on the need to justify creating a painting, doing a favor for a former beau, and less on the artwork, itself?

I,, have struggled with similar. It was more about excuses, than anything else.



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