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sounds to me like you already know the answer. deal breaker broken.... deal off. he has no regard from you from what you are stating. sounds like you know the answer and are putting it off by using the i love him as an excuse to stick around.
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How I long to be up rather than down, the eternal sorrow that I only escape for short periods. This must be how Persephone felt.
"Sleep. Those little slices of Death. How I loathe them." Edgar Allan Poe
Loving yourself must come first from there comes love for everything else.
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