Last week, I left my session early and in a mess.

I was angry at myself for being annoyed that t let me leave that way and didn't check in with me afterwards. Not that I expected her to, I suppose after 6+ years I just thought she would validate my pain especially as when I said i was Sui in that session, she didn't really believe me.

I ran because I was overwhelmed and T's voice was getting more frustrated (she called me lots of things to) and I felt I had to run. I ran in the dark afterwards and ended up crouched by a church, then a bus turned up. I didn't even care that I was in a vulnerable location in town.

I feel embarrassed, I just want to go in an terminate, but I feel t is going through something herself. I'm so nervous