Have gotten down very low. I was doing so much better, but I've kind of lost that. Now I have to drag myself and make myself do the things I should. I've accepted that that is the only way to fight depression. I'm not even succeeding at doing that. These downturns pass, but they keep coming back worse and worse. I guess I have not paid the dues it takes to earn some stability in life. I'm afraid I'm just going to get worse. Sometimes, I just wish I was dead. (no real +SI, though.)