I'm sorry you didnt get the job. Taking care of young kids is stressful. I grew up with a single mom and I had a lot of respect. I'm also a single parent. Your husband maybe trying to make up for lost time with the kids by over compensating. Children sometimes need rules and structure. I know it frustrated when one parent doesn't back up the other.
I'm sorry your meds arent helping. I lose hope sometimes too. Its hard to get motivated to do the simplest things.