I can't leave the house today. I tried... it just won't work. I know I need to get some things done, but every time I get to my car I just sit there having all kinds of negative thoughts and can't start it up and pull out of the drive.
To top it all off everything I'm doing here I just keep doubting myself and checking it over and over again. It's so frustrating! I hate myself! I don't know how much more of this I can take. Great! Now I'm ***** crying again. If you guys knew what I used to do for a living, you wouldn't even believe it. I'm a lousy mess anymore!

I don't mean for my posts to sound like so much drama. I just don't know what to do...