Quote:
Originally Posted by Soulsisters
Hi,
I am recently divorced. I was living in a terrible verbal/emotionally abusive marriage. I got out luckily after 20 years. I had a terrible panic attack and could never go home again . If any of you are aware of the type of person who verbally abuses another, they need control. My sons would not come with me once I was well enough to ask them to.
My x has turned them so far against me with lies, half-truths, and half-lies, that my 17 year old will not speak one word to me. My 15 year old will talk a little, but is angry as well. He only got the bare minimum of custody and they won't even see me then.
I have been fighting so hard to get my life back together since I left. I am feeling my old self begin to come back. But my heart hurts so much for my sons.
I have not told my sons one bad word about their father. Not one. The therapists said it will be better for them . While he has slandered me throughout an entire community.
Will I ever get my sons back?
|
I agree about taking the high road, continue to not slander their father. It's for them, to see through the lies. Can you return to court, or speak to an attorney, if there is court ordered custody in your favor, and though of an age of being able to decide, they are still minors, and it[not spending their court ordered time with you] hinders your ability to take the time to be with your children.
That is something, you can do, behind the scenes. It's possible, they feel abandoned, if that's how your ex is portraying you. It's up to him, to foster a healthy respect for their mother.
All you can do, is let them know you are there for them, and love them.
Life doesn't come with a crystal ball.
I know, that my ex isn't speaking negative of me, nor I him. My children have relayed, as much to me. If only, others, in their hostility towards the other parent could do as much. It harms the children, and their future spouses and children, in ways unfathomable.