I am glad you can go to the shelter; they should be able to help you with an attorney (1st visit usually free) I got a divorce after 31 years of verbal abuse (some physical); the book that saved my life: The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans..Yes, get a plan in place; don't tell him ANYthing or talk or argue; he is being irrational and irrational....is dangerous. Call a Domestic Violence Hotline, go to the shelter; stay safe. Hugs and Love, Nicole