the answer is in your own post....you need to take care of your self and your own happiness. you have given up enough of your life to help your mother who unwilling to do anything to care for herself. as you have said, nothing is enough for her. she needs to learn how to stand on her own two feet. she makes her own choices and should suffer the consequences of those choices. you should not be suffering the consequences of her choices. you have had enough of that. you are not responsible for your mother.