Hey, I have two little guys and I am about to try for another one. I wasn't diagnosed yet with my first so no meds. For my second I went off all meds and since one if those meds was Abilify which was truly awful for me I immediately felt soooo much better (Abilify is category B tho if you liked it). So second preg no meds, breastfed for a year through an episode. Probably should have just quit sooner and gotten on meds but well I had to journey my own way I guess. So now I'm gearing up for baby number three and I almost thought I couldn't because I decided it was not responsible or feasible for me to go off my Lamictal and parent my two boys. But I talked to my OBs about it and they were like no prob. They sent me for preconceptual counseling with the perinatalogists and they were like this is no big deal at all. They said based on the newest info I have no more reason to worry than anybody else. The cleft lip thing is old. So I was overjoyed to get the chance to be pregnant again and add to our family. I am actually weaning off my klonopin as we speak because I do want to do it without my klon. But they actually told me it was better for me to use it sometimes if I needed it than to get all stressed out.

So anyway that is the deal with my meds. Sleep is the next big problem. The sleep dep made me manic. So next time DH knows he is on night duty. We have to get me sleep. Real sleep. I don't know how this will work with breast feeding. If I decide to do it at all on the Lami , I won't do it exclusively. I don't think it is a good idea nor is it necessary to out that much stress on me.

Now the just handling kids part. Support is a good thing. I actually don't have a lot. Difficult family not in town kinda thing. But I am now feeling the burn of having two cuz my baby is a toddler and so I found a preschool I love, I finally found babysitters I love, I have friends to lean on. I may hire a mother's helper when the next one is here. We shall see. With my first I really immerses myself totally. I never left him, never delegated. He was a sensitive guy but it was me too ya know. Now I am ready to let myself have a little more space. I need it so I can keep myself together.

But don't despair. Us Bipolars can be great mamas! I have never loved being anything more.