Quote:
Originally Posted by someone321
I'm so sorry that you have to go through this.  I think it is great that you managed to say all these things - that was really brave but also very helpful I think! But what did she reply to it? Did she address it anyhow? Maybe her reaction made you feeling bad afterwards?
I hate that feeling too... When I feel so bad after the session I just try to convince myself that I won't let my T have a control over me and my T cannot make me feeling so bad... Sometimes it actually works... I hope that you will feel better soon...  |
Her reaction could have contributed. She kind of flipped things around out of nowhere and said I am free to talk about it and she actually encourages it. When historically she doesn't let the conversation go anywhere before saying she's causing me too much harm and no longer helping and maybe I should try someone new for a bit. She said the door is always open if I want to come back to her, but it hurts to feel like I can't freely talk about anything without fear of judgement or abandonment.
I know many people will wonder why I don't just leave...that this obviously isn't healthy. It's not that easy, though. She saved my life this year...literally. Several times. And she has been SO available to me with zero complaints- not
once! Not many T's are like that! She is so rare! But it comes with a price. :'(
I can't stop crying I feel so dramatic but it's hard. It's hard feeling as if you love someone so deeply and all they will ever do is rip your heart out and walk away like everyone else.
This is what hurts the worst...If a seasoned
therapist is making me feel this way, how can I ever heal and trust anyone? She is literally showing me EVERYONE will screw you over in the end.