People blow people suck, no wants to be nice no one cares unless you got something they want. I am consumed by this hateful city and society. I hope I can close my eyes and not see this ever again. I don't care what bad **** befalls on me. As long as I don't get to open up give any care I'm ok. **** them I don't care now. Being stir crazy sick and sore physically all the time. Miserable and negative the two edged sword is you are aware of your surroundings and have intelligence who is and who isn't real. I hate being a dude expected to follow stupid rules to get a girls attention. If you are all into games go play monopoly or mariokart. I don't care for your crap you try to put on me saying I need to be this or that, because I gave you my all of who I am as a person. You don't see anything you just want to always look pretty and look good for everyone else because you are full of low self esteem and want people to feel bad as you. I hate people they aren't healthy ever normal never existed my life is a lie and being told what I should do about it doesn't accomplishes anything. Lame advice, lame friends, lame people, stuck trying to be positive as possible and being told you aren't this or that and then when I do whatever is needed to help myself I am still being told in my city I am not positive enough and they go complain how they guy or girl doesn't like them or they are lonely. This is a load of crap tell me the truth I don't need this anymore. I don't even go outside because how much I hate people. I don't have any trust in people not even my parents or anyone. Why am I supposed to be the one to pick up all the pieces or everyone else's crap when I never asked for it and never cared for it, but no people expect me to be casual friend they can throw their troubles on me. That's emotional abuse I don't like anyone because everybody does it especially my mom. I can't take it we are all dead in this broken world. I don't want to be here now. I hate it yeah I am negative today, because I've waited to long and demanded more than enough to get anything I deserved from working hard being there. Actually paying attention looking out for any of my friends well being and all I get is. Have a nice day I don't care. People can go die for all I care, love don't exist the only thing it's being alive is the noose it's hung on by the media who doesn't care to show people that we are caddy and lifeless and don't care to tell you the truth. Lies need to stop for me to get anywhere, people need to stop being lazy, and being halfassed friends for me to help them. I don't care. I don't love and plan not to. I just am so close to closing my heart again and leaving it shut for a long time for the second time. I know how to do it and I'm not afraid to do so.