I really hope ECT works out for you somehow. ECT helped me immensely after my year of self destruction in 05-06. I don't recommend it for everyone because the memory loss was pretty severe but if you're out of options it will almost definitely work. And your memory does come back, eventually. Took me about a year to recover cognitively. But it definitely helped my depression. I had to do a lot of trauma work in therapy after that to recover fully but it helped get me out of bed.