i guess what i am saying is i have never been in control when it comes to a sexual relationship, i have always done what i have been told, dont get me wrong, thats what i want, i want them to instigate everything, i want them to be in control, to tell me what to do, when to do it and how, i just dont get it when i do all of the above and somehow i am still not doing what they want, i pick domenering women for a reason, and that reason is lack of self confidence in myself, it doesnt help when i do what is desired of me and it still is not enough, when i tryed to instigate anything i got shot down quicker than a brit plane in a us airspace warzone, sorry low blow, but you get my point, blunt has it may be, how can i be to blame when the sexual relationship fails if i was not in control of it in the first place?