This can't go in with my kids around. Now that I know from my attorney what my financial options are, I am no longer afraid. My goal is to stay in the house, but if we have to sell it, I will put the money that I get away and save up to buy a smaller condo at some point.

When I tell him, I know that he is going to get mad so I have a safety plan in place. He is also going to insist on taking the van we just bought, but I am going to try to work it out with him to keep the van because it is a better car for the kids. If I have to, I can probably get a court order to have him refinance the van into my name and then I will sell him my car for $1. I will try to get him to pay for the van as well as the mortgage on the grounds that he should be concerned about his son's safety.

He is supposed to be taking Friday off from work, so that will give him a chance to pack up some stuff and get going and find a place to go.

This is going to be scary, and suckish, but it is really the best thing for me and my kids.