I hide what I do so no one knows. I have not posted here before and I am scared but I was wondering if there's anyone who hides hurting? I hurt because I have to and it's something that relieves my pain. But no one knows this because I don't hurt where anyone can see. I don't want anyone to know because I don't want to be judged or put down for something no one else can understand. It's a secret like all the abuse was. Love was pain and pain was given to keep the secret and the secret still exists today beneath it all. I don't want others to see because it's not a show, it's mine and it is what relieves what no one else can see or feel. I don't know if this is making any sense but I know what I am trying to say. I hate this but it is what makes me know I am alive. It makes me have a way to relieve what builds and builds so that it doesn't swallow me. Does anyone hear me? I