Quote:
Originally Posted by Supanova
Cutting is not a life choice, it is a coping strategy. People are never going to be ok watching someone else self injure, unless they have some mental problems themselves. People who take benzos in any sign of distress are looked down on too, and it is very much discouraged, although does happen more than it should.
When you self injure you do have "some sort of disease" a mental one. This is why people cant accept it - it is not normal, mainstream, acceptable or healthy behaviour.
I wont lecture you on the benefits of stopping, its a sure fire way for you to dismiss everything I say, but if I could stop, anyone can. I was chronic but now my life is much happier.
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Ok, well I don't know what benzos are. And I'm not asking people to watch me do it. I just want them to recognize it as my method of dealing with it and stop trying to 'correct' me.
I don't care about being normal or mainstream. Those things are highly overrated anyways. As far as healthy and acceptable behavior... smoking, drinking, and eating fast food is totally acceptable behavior that is completely unhealthy. My cutting isn't slowly killing me, yet these other human behaviors are perfectly ok? Why is it that
I am seen as the destructive one?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rapunzel
How would you feel if you had a child or someone you cared about, and they were not dealing with things in a healthy way but cutting or doing something else that is unhealthy? What would you honestly tell someone else who is like you about cutting?
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Someone who was like me and cutting? well, I think I would be able to relate to them, but I couldn't and wouldn't tell them they should stop. I think i would give them advice as to hygiene and what implements to best use so as not to do unintentional damage... areas to avoid, etc. you know, practical advice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rapunzel
You are right in recognizing that it serves a function for you, and that it keeps you from thinking of your problems but doesn't make them go away. The first step in being able to change is acceptance. You have the acceptance. You are aware of what you do and why you do it.
It doesn't sound like you are asking for advice on how to change, yet, and that is available when you are ready for it. For now, maybe it will help to talk to your family and other concerned people about acceptance of the function in what you are doing. Remember, they will be more able to hear you when you are able to express yourself calmly and present your thoughts in a rational way. You have to be willing to hear them out too, if you want them to hear you out. It is only fair. They love you and are concerned about you and want to help you to be healthy.
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You are correct, I was not asking for advice on how to change. I'm ok with the way I am and how I think and deal with things. I just want other people to be ok with it. Not necessarily EVERYone, but at least the people that matter to me. I've tried to talk with them before. They freak out about it. My family just keeps trying to send me to counselors, and my friends just give me an earful and say that I stress them out.
Quote:
Originally Posted by X BabyG x
I Accept it  |
Thank you. now if i could only get this sentiment from more people in my life, that'd be great.
Quote:
Originally Posted by littlebitlost
Just wanna send you a big hug, from one cutter to another.
People will never accept is, as it's a maladaptive coping strategy. "Cutting is not a life choice, it is a coping strategy"
Through CBT and DBT and other therapy, you can find 'healthier' ways to handle problems and feelings.
I feel the same way about cutting as you do I think. However I am actively trying to deal with my issues and dramas and crap, and use other dumb coping mechanisms to try and avoid getting out my sharps. :/
Im trying to get better, or be at least 'managed' (lmao) with my BPD and learn all the stuff they teach me.
'When the student is ready, the teacher will come.' Very true. I had to change my whole way of thinking before I was ready to learn and try to change. And it's ****ing hard work. It's retraining the brain.
I am an addict, and used pain pills, valium and booze to numb out the issues and feelings, and I know how bad this can get, so I know how badly I need to change.
I hope you can get to the point of less cutting. It's just another addiction, we go back to it because it feels good, and works - every time. Whereas journaling, meditation and breathing aren't a gauranteed. BUT - if you commit to trying a 'healthy' strategy before cutting, perhaps you can reduce it a bit?
I know I've gone off topic from your post, but I just wanted to share with you what *I* have learned on the long path I've embarked upon.
*HUGS*
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Yeah, I have a past diagnosis of BPD as well. I actually had a
posted topic of that on this site as well. DBT was suggested to me, but it's not something I'm interested in. I can't get into the mindfulness practices nor do I believe in meditation. There has been some other advice given to me that isn't so yoga/hippie. I'm trying it out... sorta. But again, my issue isn't about me finding an alternative coping method to cutting. It's getting people to understand that it's just what I do.
Cutting may not be a life choice, but it
is a part of my life.