I don't have insurance so I can't go to any kind of therapy or counseling. I only work part time and can't afford to pay a therapist right now. I have a feeling that my boyfriend is going to be moving out; he hasn't talked to me since Tuesday. Tuesday was the anniversary of my grandmothers passing and a really hard day for me. I was quiet for the most part and very short spoken when I did speak. I have tried explaining my behavior and apologizing for being short with him but he doesn't seem to care.

I don't have any friends there isn't anyone to talk to around me. I don't feel that anyone would understand my feelings even if there was someone to talk to. I sit around most days and contemplate suicide. Mostly the reason I haven't attempted anything is I don't think it would be fair to my son or my mother.

I've always been a very strong person, always thought depression was an excuse. I feel differently now that I am having the same feelings as someone who has actually been diagnosed with depression.