((markar)),

Welcome to PC. Well, none of us here are professionals so we can't diagnose you. I am very sorry you have had so much stress and responsibility put on your shoulders.

However, if someone is put into a scenario where they are constantly under stress and in "fear" yet they remain hyper vigilant and push away their immediate fears/anxieties to keep going, yes, eventually that can produce PTSD, but not always. What concerns me about you is that you didn't have help or an actual "adult source of security" there for you either. It also sounds like your mother battled illness most of your life as well, that didn't give you a parental figure that you felt secure with and that can also produce "anxiety" to begin at an early age.

You sound like you are still very "young" yet and you have to deal with that challenging part of life as well, just growing up.

I think it is important that you find a therapist, a therapist that is a "stable" source that you can work with that can help you slowly work through all this stress from having so much responsibility put on your shoulders while you were much too young to be able to deal with it all mentally and emotionally.

How is your mother doing now?

((Hugs))
OE