Hello Siftnsand, do you like the way things are or are you looking to change anything? It sounds like you have low self esteem and anxiety likes to hold hands with depression. Have you thought of having therapy? I'm glad you have your music and you enjoy performing. Welcome to Psych Central!
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Pegasus
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein