Melania,

I have been following your threads, one that ended in you saying you don't need therapy, you need your therapist to make love you to, and you want to die. You have also mentioned being suicidal.

You are not suffering from erotic transference, you are suffering from eroticized transference. You have gone way beyond the point where you have the hots for your therapist, this is taking up EVERY SINGLE thought you have, and it's unhealthy.

I suggest you find a new therapist.