I appreciate what you all are trying to do,
But I should be honest with you... I don't think I'm at the point where I can accept that it wasn't my fault.

And I hope you don't mind if I do some more ranting. I figured since I made this thread as a vent I may as well just keep venting in it.

It's late and I am triying my best to sleep but I'm still seeing him every time I close my eyes and I keep having memories flooding back. As time goes on the longer I go without sleep the more upset with myself I get. I don't want to end up like I did a few months ago. I'm getting so sick of taking one step forward and eight steps back.