I maybe different as in this mindset I grew up believing. I am a male, don't believe in double standards, but in respect for humanity instead. I was abused my whole life, I am very much in touch with my sexuality. I am straight, slightly bi curious, but I think that's temporary. The thing is I can't marry, I don't believe in the concept completely impractical. I want be in a polyamorous relationship. I know deep down I be happy with a group than just one. My city isn't poly friendly from both the straight and gay communities. I am recently coming to terms I am ok being a man, but I've see myself as a woman since birth. I thought if I was a woman born one, I could be a better lover to other women, but I'm happy being a sensitive dude. I just know how to respect myself the females. I love women I grew up around them, but I have a brain like a female I talk like them sometimes. I am like the urban dictionary definition of a male lesbian, even though it sounds preposterous on face value. I read into it as a hetero man trapped in his body as a female. That's so me, I would love to feel beautiful go through the pain having a baby going through so much to give back. That's what makes me this way, I would appreciate it greatly over what I am. I am not an ugly dude, I've been complimented on my looks before. I just hate having to feel like the monogamy thing is mandatory for anything anymore, because I have to put that in the closet. I am sexually attracted to on a basic level having a physical group relationship with 2 females or 3 only, but that feeling of family together as a group is comforting to me. Truly is, it's sad that people don't see what I see. I don't cheat, never cheated in a single relationship been cheated on, dated some nasty women who were very much open legs after me or before. It was horrible. I get scared having sex because of that, I'm not afraid of getting close, more of ruining something over something stupid like that. I do have a lot of physical feelings that women have. I had a weird incident when I was greiving I had contractions like a woman would when on a period or labor it was very painful, but now when I think of it. If I had the body and the looks, I could do so much more with a face of recognition of what I stand for I am feminist, but I'm not stupid either on this. I read a lot and know both men and women need the respect deserved and double standards are basically not doing anything but making the gap wider and ruining what is left of love. I really believe I would love a woman with all my heart and the group too. I truly have feelings for each and everyone of them, but I know enough bout poly relationships they are more challenging that a regular relationship. The thing is I would prefer all of them to be bi in any way, because I want their love not projected to me, but to each other physically I think 3 girls would even out the playing field and fair. I can't have guys right now, because that's not what I want. That's all I have for that one rule for the group. I'm not a favorites person, I just want to have fun in the moment with some really cool ladies. I lived my whole life growing up with women. I want to hopefully have a lifelong relationship that resembles that. What people don't get I have to hide it in where I live? it's out of my citie's cutural norm especially, but it's in my personality and my innate nature to have the utmost desire for it. I would rather have that, than a monogamous relationship, but I can still do it though fine. It's hard. much love everyone.