Quote:
Originally Posted by tufan
. Internally, I think I am discovering something tremendous. I think I would feel flattered if men glanced my way (even though I am married) but I don't think it ever happens.
: Is it normal to feel ugly and ignored when you are going through a relationship crisis? This seems so superficial and I am almost ashamed to post this, but maybe if I release this; excise it from my reality, then I can move on and concentrate more fully on the good things that I feel within despite my situation.
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I don't find it superficially stated, whatsoever. To answer the thread question, 'what is 'ugly' to men?' A woman can be a super model beauty, but if her personality is ugly, so is she. Sounds cliché, but it's reality.
Looking for attention, outside your marriage, can be a slippery slope, at the same time, if it's something you need in order to rebuild your self confidence, and it's done with an air, of noticing being noticed, without crossing any lines, then start paying attention to your surroundings. I state it's a slippery slope, because, then it could start to play on your mind, with a grass is greener scenario, which, truly it is not.
Have you checking into the forum here, on Self Esteem? Or, the Relationships and Communication Forum, to address anything within your relationship, that others could help you sort through and perhaps learn ways to express the needs that need addressing, since you mention being in the midst of a relationship crisis.
Is your husband, feeding into this sense of not feeling attractive, or is this something completely from within?
What steps can you take, to regain your confidence levels about your femininity?
Sometimes, basic steps, such as using make up or dressing up, a little more than usual. Going from workout clothes to something that leaves you feeling more alive and vibrant, can help.
Are you feeling 'ugly'/'unattractive' or are you feeling a bit 'frumpy' and in need of just attending to your outer dress appearance, how you present yourself can go a long way.
I know that in my marriage, I stopped tending to my feminity, but that started with jabbing insults, as to 'who are you putting make up on for?' Who are you trying to impress, you are going out like that?(in regards to wearing a casual skirt one day). My marriage epitomized controlling behaviors, and it wasn't conducive to feeling good about myself. I didn't even feel comfortable looking up, to dare catch a glimpse of a man, because that would invoke a jealous tirade. I hope, your relationship, is nothing like that. And I hope, this is just you being in a bit of a rut, from routine and the daily mundane.
