(((((((((((((therealme)))))))))))

damned if you do and damned if you don't...

(i guess the notion is that a girl should put out for them and nobody else. if a girl doesn't put out for them then she is a 'hold-out' or is 'frigid'. if a girl puts out for others - as well as them - then she is a 'slut' or a 'pro' or whatever)

(female exclusivity is important to guys - evolutionary explanation seems relevant here where a guy doesn't want to spend scarce resources on raising another mans child. a lot of research has been done on 'female promiscuity' - why 'promiscuity'? - , however, and in a lot of the animals we thought were in an exclusive mating pair the females went on a 'best genes' hunt when the male was out of sight ;-). makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. the males that are the best providers might well not be the males that are most virile. the best strategy is for the provider male to think you are faithful so he provides resources but to go on a best genes hunt when he isn't looking. there is some stuff on the function of 'romantic love' being to motivate adultery (rather than long term pair bond) as the cost of being found out is high (could get beaten up and / or exiled).

but in these days of birth control and with our developed frontal lobes etc etc... we have the capacity to transcend our evolutionary selected urges...

i do think this stuff is rather cool though ;-)

(i know i promised to shut up... but i'm not preventing others from posting so... oh well)