Dear T, I wonder if the dreams I sent you will show this - I haven't really worked with them yet - but I am really struggling with something. That's a bit mild perhaps; emotionally I am fighting something tooth and nail. It's this need thing again - I don't feel it all the time, but sometimes is even too much. It's this needing YOU stuff, and I-don't-want-to-need-you!!! (You would be picturing me stomping my feet if you were reading this, wouldn't you?) Not wanting to is not about you btw, maybe you already know that. And the worst part of this is I understand it now which makes it even more suckish. Sigh. I want to tell you this in a couple days when we talk but I don't know if I will be able to.