I never directly confronted him about it until he called me out on dating this man while we were SEPARATED. I told him that I knew he didn't sleep with this mystery woman, but that I knew beyond a doubt that he left me so he could. He spent all his free time with her (I don't know her but one day the kids and I were driving and we saw him driving with a woman). They kept saying who;s daddy with? So I called him and no answer. I called him a few more times and he said she was a friend he ran into and gave her a ride. That I also got phone calls from people in town to let me know they saw him with some females at the local meting place (a club like place). so our trysts were not the same at all, I just had sex and he found out. His saying he was disgusted never left my head as you can probably tell. Nor did this behavior from five years ago that I can't seem to let go of either. We put on a good front for the kids. I just feel guilty that I can't seem to give him more now that he makes a genuine effort to change, and has changed in some ways. But that doesn't erase the past. I guess its true that you can forgive but not forget. I worry about the future of us being elderly together, and having to be his caretaker. It could be a hellish existence...I've seen it in some older couples. I like to think that we are doing the right thing now and that will bring us peace in the future. Focusing on my kids, work and schooling helps. If my mind and time weren't occupied I'd be even more obsessed than I am now. Thank you for being supportive of this long, complicated, probably redundant story